As I was telling you yesterday, Chichi did a presentation at school on Mahatma Ghandi. So my new parenting technique is to refer to Ghandi about everything. For example, if Chichi say she doesn’t want to eat all her dinner my response is: “Well Ghandi would never waste food.” If she refuses to be nice to her brother, I say: “That is not peaceful.” Or, when she watched me get dressed this morning and did not bother to get out of bed, I said: “Mahatma Ghandi would never do that.” As I was over-using the Ghandi referrence, my husband was behind Chichi fake-gagging himself. My response to that: “Whatever works buddy!”
Belated Mother’s Day wishes May 11, 2009
I wish I was an organized person and was able to keep up with dates, anniversaries and most importantly people’s feelings. I know that I should be able to care for all the people that matter to me, but for some reason, it is just not always possible. I apologize for getting my Mother’s Day post up so late.
Being a mother makes Mother’s Day a little different. Before you become a mother, you want to salute yours because you love her and she is special. I think that until you are a mother yourself, you have no idea how hard it is. There are a million reasons why it is hard and a million other things that make it so. Sometimes we take our mothers for granted and believe that unconditional love is in their DNA. It is not. Sometimes it is a struggle to deal with our children. There is not always support for mothers from family or friends. It can be lonely even. For these reasons I want to salute some very special moms in my inner circle.
First I have to take my hat off to my own mom. She lives in a parallel organized universe to which she did not give me the key. Her attention to detail and organization completely baffle me. She always knows how to choose details for gifts and receptions for us and others that blow me away. My mom is a very gracious host and an extremely generous person. She taught me the value of remembering that we are here because others have helped us get where we are. There is no one in my mom’s church that she has not baked for, or entertained. She is constantly opening her home and her heart to new friends and old. My mom is an excellent friend, wife, mother and grandmother and I love her for all of her great qualities.
Secondly, there is my grandmother. She is an amazing person. At 80-something she has less memory loss than I do. She knows what all her children, grandkids and great-grandkids are up to all the time. Not only is she able to remember what all of them are doing, she is interested and cares. I love that she is an avid walker, reader and cross-worder! She is a role model and I cherish her for being that to so many of us.
Thirdly, there is my dear friend here at work. She is much more than a colleague and friend – she is a member of the family. I love the fact that motherhood the third time around changed her in such a beautiful way – she became complete. It was one of the most amazing personal transformations I have had the privilege to witness and it really makes me get all misty-eyed to think about how one person can really embody the word “mother” so completely.
Finally I have to mention my sister-in-law. She “mothers” so many people in her immediate and extended family that she really deserves to be honoured on Mother’s Day. It seems to me that there are certain people who are born with the “motherhood gene” and she is living proof. Motherhood is what makes her tick and what she exudes. I really try to listen to her well because I have so much respect for someone that cares for so many.
I love being a mom and I love my kids, but for me motherhood is a work in progress. To me it is like a huge editing job – a tweak here, an adjustment there. Most of the time I feel like I am not doing a bang-up job, but I keep stumbling and bumbling on. From what I hear, that is all part of being a mother too. Happy Mother’s Day to all of us – mothers and children alike!
What is the importance of April 21st… April 21, 2009
Well, today is a holiday here and we asked our students to look up the reason behind the holiday. Since I knew that everyone would be able to do research and tell us what the holiday signified, I decided to talk about what it means to me personally.
It is my father’s birthday. That may not seem all that significant in itself to you, but my birthday is just 2 days after my father’s birthday. I have always felt it is very special that my birthday and my father’s are so close together. I have always been close to my Dad and as I was growing up I was always told that I looked a lot like him. To me that always seemed a little weird – why did I have to look like a man? But now as an adult I can perceive that these similarities are actually very special.
I live very far away from my Mom and Dad, but I still try to be close to them. I think about them every day and they are the real guides in my life. That is something that never changes regardless of our age. For all these reasons, April 21st is a special day for me.
Happy Birthday Dad…
Insomnia April 17, 2009
I woke up the other night when my son was calling me to help him go to the bathroom. Once I had taken him to do the deed, I could not get back to sleep. I tried several fool-proof methods to get back to sleep and after an hour with no success, I gave up. So I went down to watch TV. American Beauty was on and I got sucked into watching it again. It is very weird. The first time I watched it I walked away thinking – man, those people in that film are FREAKS! When I watched it this time I could see myself in some of the characters at some points. Mid-life crisis? Mommy guilt? Whatever category it falls under, it made me go up and hug my kids. I kissed them and whispered to them how much I love them. My son that day had told me not to be mad at my daughter. He told me to be nice to her. I was pretty taken aback by that and the fact that he is so able to articulate his feelings. Like I may have said before he narrates his life and is constantly talking. But that level of communication is something I never experienced with my daughter. She just does not open up like that about her feelings. Anyway, after listening to him and talking to my daughter, we are working on caring for each other more. I am trying to convince them that listening to me and doing what I want them to do is a way of showing caring. I am a slow learner with this whole motherhood thing and I think I will be working on teaching my kids how to be caring for the rest of my life. I am not sure that I am the best example for showing caring, but I want to try. I think it is something important to be taught in the home and by the child’s parents.
Long-awaited news about Easter… April 16, 2009
I may be going out on a limb here, but I think it is time to write about Easter. The kids and I were home alone and so we went over to our friends’ house on Good Friday. The kids dyed eggs and we ate grilled fish on the barbie. As with all good gatherings in this part of the world, it started a little after noon and wound up around 9pm. The kids were waiting for the other family to go home and so was I. When one of the hosts fell asleep in his chair at the table, we all made a mass exodus!
The next day we played all morning with the 15 eggs Chichi and Lu had dyed . It was so funny because some of the eggs were a little crushed and so the dog wanted to get in on the action too! We started out with both kids hiding the eggs for me to find. After a while we all took turns hiding for the other two. The funniest thing was when Lu was hiding his eggs. He would put all 15 in a low flower pot and when we came to find them he would lead us right to them. It was hilarious. He was squealing and going on, all excited about the egg hunt. Chiara was increasingly tricky with her hiding spots and used her climbing skills to get up high enough to make it more difficult for me. That was a fun way to pass the time. I was not sure what we were going to do with all those cooked eggs. I had thought of egg salad sandwhiches or something like that, but at the end of the day, I did not have to worry about what to do with the eggs. When we got back from going out with a friend for pizza on Saturday night we found a mass of egg carnage on our varanda. The dog ate all 15 eggs in their shells. I was sure he was going to be sick as a dog the next day, but he wasn’t. I have no idea where that expression comes from.
We went back out to our friends house the next day for another Easter meal after the Easter bunny came to our house. My husband had suggested painting the floor to make a bunny trail to the kids’ Easter eggs. I talked to a couple of friends and they suggested using flour instead to make it. I did. It was nice. It worked. The kids loved it, but… our floors are very light. I had to use quite a bit of flour to get any effect. If you can manage to picture this in your mind, you can imagine the state of the place after everyone had run around in the flour with their chocolate Easter eggs. I think I may not do the bunny trail in flour again!
St. Patrick’s Day March 17, 2009
I forgot to wear green today, but I received this Irish Blessing from a friend and thought I’d share it with you:
May the road
Rise up to meet you
May the wind
Be at your back
May the sun
Shine warm
Upon your face
The rains
Fall soft upon your fields
And
Until we meet again,
May God hold
You in the hollow
of his hand
Proud Mama March 17, 2009
I guess there is no reason why we are not allowed to brag a little about our kids on our blogs, right? Even if the answer is no, I am going to anyway!
Chichi did a painting of a cat in art class, as did the rest of the first grade. However, hers is placed right near the door to the library in a position of honour. I was so surprised and pleased that I got all teared up when I saw it yesterday. I phoned my husband and he and Chichi went to see it after school. She and I went to look at it today and we checked out all the other kids’ paintings too. She seemed quite proud and I know I sure was! I was also really proud of her the other day when she was doing her nightly reading. She has started reading at night with her Dad in Portuguese and I am surprised at how well she is doing. She can read most of the books that we have for her in Portuguese and she seems to becoming more fluent in her reading. However, I was thrilled the other night when I read one page of “Go Dog Go” and she read the other. We did the same last night for the Curious George original story. When Lu wanted me to read and sing Itsy, Bitsy Spider to him, Chichi wanted to read “Green Eggs and Ham”. I told her no, and so she went ahead and read it on her own. She was reading it to herself, but it sounded like she was really able to read it on her own. I was so happy about that.
In other developmental milestones, Lu went through last night diaper- and accident-free!
In further developmental milestone delays, Chichi and Lu started going to sleep on their own last Friday. However, they both ended up in our bed at some point during the night. The update on that: they have been in their beds ever since. That my friends is only about 3 years late!
Wowsers… March 12, 2009
I’m not sure if I have been lazy, busy or a bit of both. One thing is for certain – my blog has been left behind. So here’s what’s been going on. I was away last week with some students and I am off again next week for a conference. (That in itself has meant that life has been busy, not to mention all the other things I do.) At the conference I am going to be presenting a case study on blogs and so I had my students create their own blogs today. It was interesting to see their enthusiasm and think about all the great things they will write in their blogs. The nice part about this blog is that it really is not about me, but my kids. They are doing well and are as funny as ever. Chichi received her first award at a school assembly the other day which really seemed to perplex her. I found out from someone else and asked her about it. She really had no idea what it was for and why she got it. As it turns out it is for helping and learning from others, which is a huge step forward for her. I was so happy for her. Chichi has also been writing notes to the family about what food is hers in the refrigerator and I am including one of those notes here: 
In case you are not fluent in 7 year old language, let me explain this to you. It is a mixture of Portuguese and English and is sort of a “Portuguized” version of an English word. It is referring to Chiara’s school snack. It is very creative spelling to say the least and closer to how you would say the English word in Portuguese. My husband was rather surprised and I must say I was pretty perplexed by the note that greeted me first thing in the morning!
On the other hand, Lu has taken to referring to himself only in the 3rd person which is a riot. He has also started to really procrastinate on eating and now wants to be spoon-fed again, which is a pain. He doesn’t eat within a reasonable amount of time and wants everything put in the refrigerator afterwards. In fact, this morning he pulled out his bread from yesterday afternoon and ate it, exclaiming: “How delicious!” He even got me to try a bite. It was not bad, but I definitely have had better. Our dog Brownie had an eating adventure the other day too. Someone accidentally left the door open and he sneaked into the house and slept on the couch. He also polished off the rest of a panetone cake and even managed to get the clip off and open the bag. What a mess that was!
So everything is pretty much the same as always except that I am trying to be more organized. I will tell you if I am successful after I get to my conference. Let’s just say that I had to do a teeny-weeny bit of scrambling to get ready for last week’s trip. That reminds me. How do you spell diddly squat?
Chichi’s Party February 7, 2009
Yesterday we had Chichi’s birthday celebration in her classroom. It was very simple because we had already done the big party on Wednesday with her friends. So yesterday was a presentation on her life followed by juice and brownies. Lu and Dinho came to the party too. When Lu got there he walked right into the classroom where the kids were playing “beat the calculator” and sat right on Chichi’s lap. It was the cutest thing ever.
When the kids finished we showed the presentation which embarrassed Chi a little as I thought it might and then we sang happy birthday. When we started to serve the cake Lu was right in there grabbing plates to put brownies on (he is not yet 3). The teacher could not believe it. He is so funny some times. Anyway, I have the best brownie recipe ever and the kids loved them. There was only one problem. When I made them the night before, I only had 6 eggs. So I could only make one batch. That meant that there was one per kid, no leftovers, and Dinho and I went without. On the way home we stopped to buy eggs so I could make more for our family!
Here is the recipe for the best brownies ever – the only thing I do differently is add the eggs one by one and beat well after each addition:
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Let soften: 1/2 lb. butter (don’t melt it)
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Melt: 5 oz. bittersweet chocolate. Let cool.
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Cream the butter with 1 3/4 cups (packed) light brown or white sugar and 5 eggs. Add 1 1/2 tsp. pure vanilla extract. Beat in the melted, cooled chocolate and 1 cup flour.
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Spread into a buttered 9×13″ baking pan. Bake 20-30 minutes (hs note: mine took 30) at 350 degrees.
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Optional: chopped nuts, or 1 tablespoon instant coffee, or 1 teaspoon grated fresh orange or lemon rind, or 1/2 teaspoon allspice or cinnamon, or a mashed over-ripe banana, or none of the above.
Kids say AND DO the darndest things… February 6, 2009
I am not sure who said this originally, but it sure is true. Case in point: Lu asking about life on the moon the other day. However, yesterday we were at the club to celebrate Chichi’s birthday and someone was playing live music in the restaurant. I kid you not when I say that Lu was rockin’ out to the music. It was so hilarious. He was sort of shaking his head to the beat with his eyes half open while batting his hands on his chest. It was just hysterical. When everyone clapped after each song, Lu was adamant that we all clapped too. It was too funny.
I want to say that I have a funny story to tell about Chichi, but I cannot think of one at the moment. It is funny, when I started to write this blog millions of stories and anecdotes were constantly popping into my head. Since I’ve been such blog slug lately those stories haven’t been coming to me as easily as they once did. If you ever talk to yourself – you know what I mean. I have very elaborate conversations with myself in my head. So when I am in the middle of one of these conversations, I then think to myself that I need to remember it to put it in the blog. I will start that habit again shortly!
