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I’m doomed…

January 18, 2011

Today was my first day back at school after a month’s break.  I was looking forward to going back to see all my friends and to get back into my routine again, but I just could not sleep last night.  At 2:00am I was still watching a less than B-rated movie starring John Travolta as a money-laundering, murdering mobster.  When my son woke me 3 hours later I was in a deep sleep.  Needless to say I was not as fresh as I could have been on the first day.  What is it with being so anxious after 17 years on the job?  And the more daunting question is this:  “If I am like this now as a relatively young person, what am I going to be like when I am genuinely old?”

I may become the kind of old person who only sleeps with the help of medication OR one that merely rests rather than sleeps.  Either way, I know I have problems kicking bad habits. 

Case in point:  I am not the best time manager and for various reasons, I need to manage it better.  So to prove to myself that I can manage my time well when given the opportunity, I spent my last week of vacation organizing as much of my house as I possibly could.  I thought I could carry that momentum into this week, but I could just not get that much done today.  (“Baby steps,” I tell myself, “…baby steps.”) 

My next example has to do with the healthy lifestyle I adopted in the last five days of holidays.  I stopped the holiday snacking and started drinking close to 3 liters of water a day while banishing the dust bunnies from our home.  I was feeling great, my skin was looking better than it has in a long time, and I was thinking I could work out the logistics of the bathroom/water ratio outside the comfort of home.  But as you may know, change is learned behavior.  I drank NO water at school today and quenched my thirst with coffee.  Argh!  Of course coffee on its own rots your stomach, so it must be accompanied by cookies.  After this ridiculous slip, I felt like I weighed about 10 tons by the end of the day.  Old habits die hard…

How is it then that my almost 91 year-old grandmother is learning to use a computer and send E-mail?

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One Comment leave one →
  1. Dad permalink
    January 18, 2011 5:51 pm

    When I was young, I laughed at the old-timers asleep at Barrie North. When I got “older” at Banting Memorial High School, I could sleep for set amount of time and awake on schedule. This takes a LOT of practise!
    PS.: Say hello to Robert P. for me.

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